8 months - 32 weeks - 224 days

What the hell is a jicama?

Time Left: 6-8 weeks
                  42-56 days

Size of Baby:  weight = 3.75 lbs.
                        length = 16.7 in.
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I have no idea what the hell a jicama is and I'm also unclear as to why my fruit ticker keeps saying that she's the size of a squash.  It's been the same fruit for 3 weeks now.  I'm starting to get a little irked.

Some background information on the jicama; enjoy. Jicama is a crispy, sweet, edible root that resembles a turnip in physical appearance, although the plants are not related. Jicama has been cultivated in South America for centuries, and the vegetable is quite popular in Mexican cuisine. Jicama has a unique flavor that lends itself well to salads, salsas, and vegetable platters. The roots can sometimes grow to be quite large, although when they exceed the size of two fists, they begin to convert the sugars that give jicama its sweet flavor into starches, making the root somewhat woody to the taste.

Harper:  The third trimester has been very relieving for me.  If you've been following my journey you know that I never really felt pregnant (still don't besides the obvious belly and the person inside that tries to punch and claw her way out sometimes).  I have read online that a lot of doctors want you to do 'kick counts', which just means to pay attention to make sure that the baby is still moving around normally.  Four movements per hour is what I was told.  Well, at this point I can sit down, poke around, and find her whenever I want to.  For instance, right now she is hanging out right above my belly button.  The problem is that I have gotten so used to her hanging out in my uterus that I don't think it's fully come to fruition that she is going to come out and be a part of the world.  I think that is a problem.  I mean, we're working on the nursery, picking out a daycare, looking for a pediatrician, gathering up outfits and necessities but the fact that she is going to spring forth from my vag is too abstract for me to handle right now.
So,  my uterus dweller:

• has finger and toe nails - I wonder if she can scratch up the inside of my uterus or if they just cover the tips of her fingers/toes.  I'm guessing that she can't scratch me up.  There would have been horror stories about that somewhere if she could.
• has hair - hopefully not a head full.  I like the nice, fine baby hair that lightly covers their head.  If she's anything like me she's probably bald.  How soon can I pierce a baby's ears?
• Is sensitive to temperature changes.
• Now has a 90% chance of survival if born today.

Prenatal Yoga: I did some physical activity this week besides walking laps throughout the school!  I thought this would be a nice, light activity to do since I haven't done anything since the half-marathon.  Unfortunately I was dead wrong.  I have done yoga before and generally don't really enjoy it.  I'm a high impact, loud music, jump around kind of work-outer so yoga doesn't really do it for me.  Now, hot yoga is amazing but I can't do that while pregnant.  Anyway, I thought it would be fun to do with my bestie since she's also pregnant (due in January) so we met last night to check out a class for free.
When I got there no one else was in the studio so I immediately panic that I'm going to be the only one.  By the time class started there were five of us plus the instructor.  I was, by far, the furthest along with Robin as a close second.  The other three girls barely looked pregnant at all, which I'm sure was an advantage because they could still bend around quite easily.  I, for the first time, felt like a giant sow flopping around in her mud pen.  Here's what went down:

• Whenever I bent over (yes, I can still touch my toes) all of the blood rushed to my head and I was sure that my head would either explode or I would pass out.  About half of the class was us bending over and then raising back up.  Fun.  Downward dog and child's pose were almost unbearable.

You try doing this with a person in your belly!

Blood ------} Head

• Also while in evil downward dog position my body decided it wanted to have it's first experience with acid reflux.  So not only was blood rushing to my head, stomach acid was creeping up my esophagus and into my throat!  And yoga is supposed to be relaxing?!  How are you supposed to relax with all of your bodily fluids building up in places that they should not be?  Thank God I didn't have gas or poo issues last night or all hell might have broken loose.  They would have had a vomiting, fluffing, passed out pregnant lady on their hands.

So you can imagine that the whole time this is going on I'm thinking to myself, "There is no way I'm paying to come back and suffer through more of this torture."  And I was thinking exactly that as I checked the clock every five minutes praying that class would almost be over and it never was.  Once we got into the stretching poses I felt a lot better.  Sure I still moved around like a walrus but the stretching actually felt good.  It was at this juncture that I realized that I cannot bend the way that I'm used to.  I was reminded of that a few times by the instructor who nicely came over to 'help' me a few times (grrrr).  I like being the awesome one in class not the walrus lady who can barely get into the poses.  By the end of class I had the instruction physically holding my arm and leg down so that I could get into and stay in the correct twisty pose.  Problem there was that I couldn't even do much with her help because the twisty pose made the skin on my stomach feel like it was going to rip open.

Now, I did just do a lot of bitching and it was completely warranted however, once class was over and we left I did feel nicely stretched and relaxed.  Will I buy a 5-week pass?  No.  Might I pay for some drop-in classes?  Yes, but only for the social time with Robin and the after effects of feeling stretched and relaxed.  I'm pretty sure that the bitching and moaning will continue.

Weight Gain:  Starting weight - 140lbs.
                         Current weight - 168lbs.
                         Total weight gain - 28lbs.

According to my reading materials I am supposed to start gaining a pound a week which means that as long as I don't go swimming in vats of ice cream or smorgasbord on chips, I should weight 174-176lbs. by the time she comes. 

My Body:  Felt good this week.  No new complaints or pregnancy side-effects.  My cankles shrunk down to the point where they are still slightly swollen, but I can see my ankle bones again.  I'm tired, but that's because I don't go to sleep at a reasonable time for having to get up at 5am every day for work.

• I can no longer wear my wedding rings because my hands have swollen just enough to where they feel uncomfortable and I have to lick my finger to get them off.  It makes me feel very weird when I'm out in public somewhere with Bryan.  He has his wedding ring on and I'm all knocked up without mine.  I wonder how many people think that we're having a scandy affair when they see us out together.
• TMI ALERT - my right breasticle above the nip feels firm like there is a mass inside.  Not a Cancer mass, but I think that my lady lumps (at least one of them) is getting ready to feed Harper.  At least, I hope that's why it's getting firm where the milk production center is located.
• Apparently I'm still looking good because today in my department meeting when I was introduced and my colleagues found out that I am due November 22nd I heard, "No way!  She can't be that far along."  Ego boosts are always welcome.

The Nursery: 

Her name is hung and more butterflies have been painted.

Harper's swing -- thank you Aunt Sue!

Childbirth Class #4: We passed up a free screening to see the new Footloose movie to go to our childbirth class tonight.  Now I see why they make you pay $65 for it because if we paid less or if it was free, I'm sure that we would have gone to see the movie instead.  The problem with the class is that we're kind of over it at this point.  There are parts of the class that are interesting and informative, but how much can you possibly talk about the stages of labor before you start repeating things? I know the answer; about 2-3 hours.  Looking back, we should have just sucked it up and gone to the one-day, Saturday childbirth class in Suffolk instead of the 5-week, two hour class closer to home.  Stupid us.  So for all those preggy ladies reading this, and you all are multiplying by the day, just go for the one-day class.

Here are the 'highlights':

• We have a doctor in our class.  I have no idea what kind of doctor he is, but to get an idea of how awkward things got tonight I would like to take you back to high school, college, and/or any professional development things that you've gone to.  Are you there?  Great.  Ok.  You know 'that guy' that asks ridiculous questions and tries to contradict the teacher/presenter?  Yeah.  He's in our childbirth class.  I think that his wife was even embarrassed by how preposterous he was being.  Our nurse/instructor was talking about pushing and how the baby moves down through the birth canal and out into the world.  Mr. Doctor man asked her about 500 technical questions about the tailbone and how does being in an upright position help the baby pass by the tailbone.  I'm serious.  This was a good 15 minute debate.  I wanted to kick the back of his chair.  Bottom line is this:  dude, you are not pushing a baby out of your penis therefore don't worry about how to do it.  Also, your tailbone is not obstructing the baby's path through the birth canal.  You're a doctor.  You should know that.  
• We learned 'how to push' properly.  You must use your abs.  Plain and simple.  Along with that we were shown (and had to practice -- of course) a few positions that are good to be in while pushing.
• We got to watch a cesarian birth video.  I must say that cesarian birth is fascinating!  They didn't actually show the procedure.  It was an animation instead, but was equally amazing.  For a cesarian birth the doctor cuts through your epidermis and layer of fat underneath, then separates your abdominal muscles, and lastly cuts through your uterus to the baby.  I always thought that your abdominal muscles were cut!  They aren't!  They are just stretched out.  Once the baby is out the doctor works backward sewing your uterus, getting your abs back into place, and then sewing up your skin.  They also cut your so low (right above your pubic hair) that if you want to attempt a vaginal birth the next time around (VBAC) it really shouldn't be a problem because they don't cut the part of your uterus that does the brunt of the work.
• She also showed us forceps and the vacuum -- two tools that the doctor may use to help the baby pass through the birth canal.